Not only could I hear his lawnmower, but there he was, coming out to the moved here edge of the road. He never checked in my direction and turned the opposite way. He was taking his time, too, workout stopping to pour some goo on an ant hill, and in general, just easing along, enjoying the day. So I broke into a run and came up on him screaming like a banshee and shaking my stick like a spear. People, Porky liked to have passed out and died right there on the spot. For a minute, I thought I was fixing to have to perform CPR on him to avoid a murder charge.
Full story: http://www.gastongazette.com/news/local/column-getting-fit-and-getting-even-all-in-same-day-1.379394